The Suck In Being Stuck Together

Emily needs a life outside of the house with her peers. She needs people other than mom interacting with her. At the end of the day, I want us to delight in being around each other. I want to not only love each other but like each other again. I want to find the end of suck in the stuck together spiral we have been swirling in for months.

Wonderful But Not Restful Trip

Friday morning came too soon. I woke up exhausted. Emily was to go to school on the bus. I knew there was a 50/50 chance the bus would not show up and it did not. I loaded everything into my car and off to school we drove. I started crying on the way. I was tired and had reached a point of breaking down. At that moment, I realized that the trip had been fun, but it was also a lot of work. Todd and I had cared for Emily for the past 18 days with no help. She had trouble sleeping. She had panic attacks during every aspect of hygiene from bathing to toileting. She refused to help with transitional walking. My hips and body were sore and stiff from long hours sitting in the car and sharing a bed with Emily. My self-care had taken a back seat during the trip and I was feeling the results.

Hard Doesn’t Mean Don’t

We will face obstacles of access with Emily and her wheelchair. We will be in places with restrooms that are not adequate to meet her needs. Lifting and transitioning Emily will be physically tough on us both. We will have to help her manage her anxiety and fear as we take her out of her routine and comfort zone.